soul survivor Archives - Page 2 of 2 - ♥ Heart on My Sleeve ♥

April 26, 2017November 21, 2017

Your 2am Phone Call

“Best friends…you fight, I fight. You hurt, I hurt. You cry, I cry. You jump off a bridge, I get in a paddleboat and save your stupid ass!” -Girl From Paris

Who are your “girls”? Your 2am phone call…your cry on the shoulder, eat a gallon of ice cream, drink a few bottles of wine, dance all night, talk for hours– girlfriends? We all have them! Whether it’s one, two, or five… “our girls” are who gets us through the best and the worst of times.

For me, my friends are my family. My kids call many of my best girlfriends “auntie”…it’s just how we do it. I’m blessed to have many girlfriends that I can call upon for advice, act as a sounding board, unload in a venting session, and of course chitty chitty chit chat all night long….and usually over many drinks! When I was going through my divorce, the relationship that broke me into a million pieces, “my girls” were there for me. Even when I dug myself into a hole to just feel the pain and never want to face reality of my days, someone was always there doing the right thing. Sometimes it was letting me cry, other times it was coaxing me out on the town…and other times it was cheesy girl movies and hard alcohol! One of my favorites is with my “ROCK”, my college BFF, Luna. She and I have “Virtual Happy Hour” over the phone because she lives 600 miles away! And the funniest time… when one of my girlfriends sent me home with her Marijuana stash (prescription of course) and said, “Smoke it all girl! I don’t want to see you until next week!” Next week!!!??? She just sent me home with more pot then I had smoked in the last 10 years!

We all have our crew or our BFF, who would fight tooth and nail for you. You know she would be there for you in whatever way she can help. So who do you lean on in the time of need? It’s who I like to call…

-“Your 2am Phone Call”. When I found out that Mark had been cheating on me with an extraordinary amount of women, I lost my shit! Literally ran to the bathroom and threw up. My next move…called Athena! And yes it was close to 2am! Of course she didn’t answer…. she’s a mother of 3 and fast asleep! But she called me 1^st thing next morning! I needed her to see the photos I took of Mark’s screenshots…to make sure I wasn’t going crazy!? She even took the kids for a “play date” when I confronted Mark and kicked him out. (Read- “Power Moment” blog) And she has been there ever since.

Continue reading “Your 2am Phone Call”

April 20, 2017November 21, 2017

Your Power Moment

“Often it’s the deepest pain which empowers you to grow into your highest self” -Karen Salmansohn

The Power Moment! The moment when no one can take away your strength…the moment you are the Phoenix rising from the ashes. This is your moment. Have you had this moment yet? Or maybe you are gearing up for it, like going into battle– suit up, pull up your big girl panties and do this! Our lives will hand us shit sometimes. It’s what you do with this shit that will create your personal growth. So let’s talk about those Power Moments and how to get yourself ready for it.

Now for us Divorcees…we all have this moment. Maybe it is as shallow as how hot you looked in front of your ex and his new girlfriend or as wonderful as a win over something you were fighting for in the MSA. Either way, you have had or will have this moment. For me, it was what I like to call “The Confrontation”. The funny thing is it’s like I knew this was going to be my Power Moment. So I actually thought about it and took my time planning it out! It felt like I was making my directorial debut on my Lifetime Movie. “OK people, I want this in one take…let’s make this real…let’s make this raw…let’s do this! ACTION!”

Continue reading “Your Power Moment”

March 19, 2017November 21, 2017

Your Inner Voice

“The inner voice is something which cannot be described in words. But sometimes we have a positive feeling that something in us prompts us to do a certain thing. “ -Mahatma Gandhi

We have all had that moment in our lives where your “inner voice” is trying to tell you something. Maybe it was when you were a little girl and you had that lump in your throat because you were going to go along with the “other girls” with something bad. Maybe it’s when you were taking a risk and that voice stepped in and said, “YESSS! You got this girl!” Think about how that felt…where the feelings were in your body? Lump in your throat? Catch in your breath? Voice in your head? No you are not crazy….totally human…and a woman with a 6^th sense! We all have it…it’s just how “in tune” we are with it. So what do we do with that intuition? How do we let it help us make decisions in our life’s path?

In my almost 14 year marriage to my ex-husband, I fell asleep at the wheel, which was my marriage. I lost not only my outer voice but also the ability to listen to my inner voice. I pushed MUTE on my intuition, telling myself; this is just what it is to be married and to be married to Mark. I had muted her so much that my body was now screaming at me! Thirty-five pounds later and 3 years of painful sex— I had myself convinced that I either had cancer or some rare disease! My doctor sent me to 2 different specialists to perform various tests, ultrasounds, etc. to find out why I had such pain during intercourse. All doctors sat scratching their heads…they had no idea. But my body knew something was wrong…the only way to protect myself was to close my legs to my husband. Then the voice in my head got louder until one day driving home from the gym, I heard her loud and clear! “CHECK HIS PHONE!”

Continue reading “Your Inner Voice”

January 25, 2017November 21, 2017

My Story…

“My Story”

As I start to write this…I’m scared, nervous, excited— who the hell cares about “My” Story? But I’m here to be honest and will always shoot it straight and cut through the bullshit— so that’s why the “Warning Label” on the Home Page.

And I’ll start by saying this — this is my first attempt to a blog! So please be patient with me while I work through some shit and start this incredible journey. As the days, weeks, months go by– I will be adding stories, blogs, articles, resources. My hope is that you will find something here that will be a useful tool for you or at least make you laugh and maybe cry. Somehow someway be healing to your heart.

“My story” will unfold here for you to read, dissect, and criticize but what gives me the audacity to start a blog about divorce, heartache, marriage, kids, dating? Well….for one, because I was married for 14 years and have two pretty awesome kids (who are now entering pre-teen/teen). For reason two– notice the “italicized” WAS married? I found out at the 13.5 year mark of my marriage that my husband had been cheating on me for at least 8 years of our marriage. And not the had an oopsie- “I fell in love with someone else” kind of cheating— the “I live two lives”- Tiger Woods Platinum Level of cheating! Awesome! Good Times! (insert sarcasm). And through it all– the good, the bad, and the ugly, I held my shit together. Why? Because we are badass Moms that’s why!! I found an amazing therapist/guru, meditation, self love, inner fkn strength I never knew I had, kindness, forgiveness, and yes Love again.

So let my stories be your guide through all of it–divorce, kids, dating again, and everything in between… Think of it as your Soul Survivor’s Guide. And just to start us off– a few things I have learned along the way:

Kindness and Humor gets you a long way. Kindness can be forgiving when you thought you could never forgive. And Humor…well…shit…we all need a good laugh sometimes! Laughter is the best medicine.

Your Girlfriends/BFFS will save your life! True colors shine through the toughest times! And to get through this huge life transition you will need strong people at your side to peel you off the floor, have your back, bring wine, and everything in between.

Power of Your Story will help you find your inner strength. You will get through this! And you will get to the other side and see how this is a beginning of a new chapter not the end of your story. You have to find that power within and be able to rise above…being the Phoenix from the Ashes!

So I’m here for you…let the story unfold…

*Alix Stone

@soulsurvivor_alix_stone

aka: Soul♥Survivor

see the heart on my sleeve

January 23, 2017November 21, 2017

Hello World!

Welcome to my blog – Heart on My Sleeve – “Soul Repair Not Divorce Despair”

see the heart on my sleeve

Think of this as a “Soul Survivor’s” guide to get you through the heartache, the soul searching, holding it together for the kids, and yes- dating again! Wherever you might be in your journey, I hope you can find articles that will inspire you, make you laugh, and let you know that you are not alone. The one thing that truly got me through the tough times of divorce was my friends! So I dedicate this site to you! You know who you are…I promise to change the names to protect the innocent and the “not” so innocent. ;o) From long nights of tearful phone calls to literally lifting me up from the puddle that was me on the floor– my friends, my community, my family got me through it. So that’s why I am here for you!! Let my story help your story! Remember, you are never alone in this!

*Alix Stone

Visit me at Instagram! @soulsurvivor_alix_stone

aka: Soul♥Survivor